Dealing With Denial
The process for how to support employees through grief is, unfortunately, one of the hardest and most delicate tasks you’ll undertake as a business leader. When an employee returns to work after being emotionally traumatized, the organization tends to assume that he or she has had ample time to process their situation. Nothing could be further from the truth, as the stages of grief rarely unfold linearly nor play out on a standardized timeframe.
One step forward, two steps back
The phenomenon of disbelief can, in fact, “come and go,” and your associate may seem to be making emotional progress one day and be in utter denial the next. How you recognize this and what do you do about it can make a huge difference in your entire team’s productivity.
Denial is a river of emotions…for all
Denial is a natural initial reaction to despair. It can leave a person in a daze, unable to focus, even when they try to remain diligently busy with tasks that prevent their mind from wandering into a state of grief. Just witnessing someone in such a state can be distressing, and the domino effect of grief begins to interfere with employees far removed from the situation. Most people in denial assume that they, and everyone around them, could not possibly deal with the reality of their situation. Shutdown rapidly sets in…both in the individual and the team around them.
As a leader, how do you create a bridge of understanding for your team?
Communicate, communicate, communicate!
Honest, open dialogue and communication are imperative, with both the grieving individual and those who work closely with him. Denial, after all, is not a refusal to believe that something traumatic has happened… it’s an inability to comprehend that it’s happened to you.
It is okay to talk about these things and address them head-on. Your team will see that you are acting with courage, compassion, and truly care. It sends the message that “here at work, you are safe, you are cared for, and WE are with you…you are not alone.” This makes acknowledging the trauma less intimidating and can bolster your associate’s ability to move beyond the paralyzing effects that come with disbelief.
3 facts you should know about the impact of emotional trauma and grief:
- Everyone is stricken by emotionally traumatic events that can lead to grief at some point in their lives.
- According to The Grief Recovery Institute study, productivity loss due to grieving employees suffering silently at work is as much as $75 billion annually.
- Grief and illness are the second leading cause of performance issues at work, according to the study.
Our culture expects the grieving person to “just get over it.” At GriefLeaders, we believe that well trained and aware leaders who engage with the employee in the grief process can not only minimize the impact on productivity, but also help the grief healing process.
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